How Long Should a Wedding Speech Be?
By Dylan Hattem, author of The Wedding Speech Crisis · 4 min read
Short answer: three to five minutes. Five is the ceiling, not the goal.
Long speeches are the single most common way a wedding toast goes wrong. A room full of people holding champagne, waiting for dinner, will forgive a lot. They will not forgive minute nine.
Wedding speech length in words
Most people speak at around 130 words a minute when they're slowing down for a room, and faster when they're nervous. That puts a good speech at:
- 2 minutes: about 250 words (a short toast or a second speaker)
- 3 minutes: about 400 words
- 4 minutes: about 520 words
- 5 minutes: about 650 words (the max)
Leave room for laughter and pauses. If you write exactly 650 words, you'll likely run over five minutes on the day.
How long each speech should be
- Best man or maid of honor: 3 to 5 minutes.
- Father or mother of the bride or groom: 3 to 5 minutes.
- Siblings and other speakers: 2 to 3 minutes.
- Couple's thank-you speech: 2 to 4 minutes.
- Rehearsal dinner toasts: 1 to 3 minutes each, because there are usually more of them.
If there are five or more speakers, everyone should aim shorter. Ask the couple or planner how many speeches are planned and how much time they've set aside.
How to cut a speech that's too long
- Time it out loud, standing up. Reading silently always feels shorter.
- Cut a whole story before you trim sentences. Two strong stories beat four okay ones.
- Kill the warm-up. "For those of you who don't know me…" and long thank-you lists eat a minute fast.
- Remove anything only a few people will understand.
- Make sure what's left still follows your theme and includes the partner.
Is a 1-minute wedding speech too short?
Not if it says something specific. A tight 60 to 90 seconds with one specific story and a heartfelt toast beats a rambling eight minutes every time. If you're terrified of public speaking, a short, well-practiced speech is a perfectly good choice.